Today would have been Tony’s 57th birthday. I went to the DMV yesterday because I finally paid off Tony’s car and plan to sell it. We each had a car in each of our names, not joint, to keep the debt/income ratio down. It never dawned on me the last few months of his life to add me to the title to his car.
There was a man in his late 70s at the DMV directing people to the right line. He asked why I was there, I explained that my husband passed away and I needed to get the title of his car in my name. He looked up at me and said “he must have been young.” I replied “Yes.” He looked at me and said “know he is an angel looking down you with a million other angels.”
It’s been so long since I’ve said those words “my husband passed away” and his kind words I thought I would have cried right then and there.
The months leading up to Tony’s death though, he didn’t have much of an appetite, and long time readers will remember that it got to the point where even the SMELL of food made him feel sick and he begged me not to cook anymore. That was a tough blow, because I found solice in the kitchen. The therapy. I could get lost in a batch of bread dough and let all my troubles just melt away.
So I was shocked as shit when he asked for lamb chops for his 54th birthday – which would have been his last birthday on earth. Here’s the deal – I never made lamb chops before, and I haven’t made them since. But he loved them. That was the last meal that I remember he actually ate more than one bite before pushing his plate away.
I miss his laughter, his touch, his kiss. His miscellaneous texts during the day, his 11:30 a.m. call to my work just to say hello and that he loved me.
So today, my advice to you is to hug your kids, your spouse, significant other, dog – whoever you love in your life, and put your phone done for a while and just be thankful that they are still in your life, because no one is guaranteed tomorrow.
Thanks for all the birthday wishes for Joe yesterday – the pictures are fixed too – I didn’t realize they hadn’t shown up until late afternoon. His wife surprised him with a trip to Belize and they are leaving today. Not gonna lie, I had to look that up on a map – wasn’t exactly sure where that was!
And tomorrow is my Momma’s birthday – she’ll be 77! My sisters family and Hannah and I are going to my Mom’s house for a Mexican fiesta. It should be fun.
Make some great memories this weekend. Make it a great day!